Thursday, August 28, 2014

They Watched A Magic Trick That Impressed Their Taste Buds

"I don't know about you,
but I just got a strong whiff of a veggie burrito."

"Where is that smell coming from?"

"It smells delicious. I think I might also 
be smelling a hint of cilantro in the air."

"Smokin soy balls, is that a burrito?"

"Did you just pull a burrito out of your backpack?"

"Don't even think about it Bruce.
That is my burrito."

"Just kidding. I'll share with you.
Burrito time!
Put it in my mouth!"

"Will you be pulling a Slurpee out of your backpack 
anytime soon? I got really, really parched after that burrito."

"I could really go for a Big Gulp right about now."

"Show us another backpack magic trick. Now!"

We hope you are having a super sexy week!

Thursday, August 21, 2014

She Met A Bear Named Joe Who Likes To Sip Root Beer And Shop In The Garden Section At Home Depot

"I have a crazy story to tell all of you. 
My mom went hiking yesterday, and she saw a bear on the trail!
Luckily, he was walking in front of her, and not behind her."

"My mom named the bear Joe. 
He was very big and very furry.
She really wanted to cuddle him, but I don't think 
he wanted to cuddle. Luckily, Joe didn't seem to notice 
my mom was there, but my mom still wanted to be safe, 
so she turned around and left the way she came. 
She wanted to make sure she gave Joe his 
distance, so he wouldn't get spooked."

"I think I would poop in my fur pants if I saw a bear.
What about you? Have you ever seen a bear before?"

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

He Has A Passion For Delicate Wrappers And Thinly Sliced Cheese

"Can I tell you something very personal?"

"I have a strong passion for cheese."

"Not just any cheese, but the Kraft Singles cheese."

"I love the feeling of the plastic wrapper crinkling 
between my paws right before I peel out the cheese.
Unwrapping that cheese is just like unwrapping a gift
on Christmas morning. It's very special. 
It's also very tasty."

"Let me tell you what's special to me. 
I am reading an article on Ryan Gosling over here, 
and the noise you are making from crinkling that 
cheese wrapper is ruining my moment with Ryan."

"This time is precious to me, and that
cheese wrapper is ruining my moment with Ryan!"

"My time with Ryan is precious! 
Why can't anyone understand this?"

Thursday, August 14, 2014

He Woke Up In The Middle Of The Night With Burrito Sauce On His Face

"I had a dream last night."

"In the dream, I was bathing in a 
giant bathtub of Cheetos."

"The weird thing was that when I woke up 
from my dream, I had Cheeto dust on my lips."

"I also had a little burrito sauce on my face,
but we'll talk about that later."

"Do you think I was sleepwalking
and dove into a bag of Cheetos?"

"How many bags of Cheetos do you think
it would take to completely fill a bathtub?"

"I am going to go take a nap and think about this.
Wake me up when you successfully 
fill the bathtub with Cheetos."

Monday, August 11, 2014

The Moon Glowed Like Stardust Above The Trees

Hi Everyone!

Were you able to view the supermoon over the weekend?
This was the first time in years we were finally able to see it,
so we were pretty excited. Bruce, Daisy and I spent most of the
weekend at the park where we got a pretty spectacular view.

"I reserved this bench for us.
I thought we would get a better view of the moon from here."

"Yep, the moon looks super.
You know what also looks super?
That plate of tacos that guy is holding over there."

"Okay, I have a tiny confession to make."

"I didn't just come here for the supermoon.
I came to party."

"I also came here for the taco truck that is parked 
around the corner. Don't act like you didn't see it."

"Taaacos, with extraaa cheeeese."

"Did someone say tacos?"

We hope you have a great Monday!

Thursday, August 7, 2014

She Saw A Glittery Red Sailboat Streaking Across The Water

Hey everyone!
It's meee Daisy!

"I just saw a sailboat.
The sailor on the boat was naked.
I just thought you should know that."

We hope you have a super sexy Thursday!

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

He Took A Selfie Wearing A Spectacular Bow Tie And A Gold Star

"Hey guess what? 
I took my first selfie today."

"At first, I started posing like this."

"And then like this."

"It took me a while to get into the groove of taking this selfie."

"I had to think about a lot of things before taking this photo.
For instance, should I leave my shirt on?"

"Should I wear a bow tie?"

"Should I put on Bon Jovi? 
I felt the song Wanted Dead Or Alive would be appropriate."

"I had to consider all of these things. 
In the end, I went with just being myself."

"Here it is. My very first selfie!"

"Sexy selfie number two, featuring my beard."

"And finally, selfie number three featuring my pug feet."

"These pug feet are made for walking, 
and that's just what they'll do."

"I'm walking to Denny's after this."

"Take my paw and tell me you love me.
Take my paw, and promise me you will take me to Denny's
for an omelet this afternoon."

"Cheesy omelet now!"