Thursday, February 17, 2011

Sweater Day!

Hi Everyone!

It's Sweater Day!

Our friend Winston came up with a very thoughtful
contest, and a great way to remember our friend Stubby.
Stubby was always trying to help the planet one step at a time,
so we are putting sweaters on today, and saving some energy
by turning the thermostat down.

"For you sexy Stubby."

"Today's forecast has been partly cloudy,
with a high chance of sexy."

"Tomorrow's forecast will be cloudy, windy, rainy
and an even higher chance of sexy."

"Do you think meteorologists would get in a lot of trouble if
they wanted to eat tacos on air, while giving the forecast?
That would be entertaining, and delicious at
the same time."

"Who's cooking tacos tonight? I'll bring my sexy sweater!
I also want you to know that I am not wearing anything
underneath this."

We hope you are having a sexy week!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

How Much Can A Leotard Stretch, Because I Am Going To Dance All Night

Hi Everyone!

"Have you guys heard the new Lady Gaga song?"

"I kind of like it. I can relate to her lyrics. Some people
in Vegas have said that I look strange, but my mom says
I'm sexy. I was born this way baby."

"Turn it up to volume eight! I want the neighbors to
know who's in control. You know who's in control?
I am."

"Do you think Starbucks would still have their breakfast
sandwiches out at this hour? We should run by and check."

Thank you for all your sweet Valentine messages!
Daisy and I hope you have a great week!

Monday, February 14, 2011

For You: Our Sexy Valentines!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Can you feel the sexy in the air?
Wait, I think that may have just been Daisy
breaking wind. I told her to stop doing that
near my face.

Anyhow, we participated in Winston's Valentine card exchange,
and smokin soy balls, we were so excited by all of the
cards we received! We love all of them. I don't think
Daisy has ever had a Valentine before, but
she sure made up for that this year!

It's crazy that we managed to hang all of these cards up
on the fridge. Especially considering we only have
five small magnets.

"I'll let you in on a little secret of mine since it's
Valentine's Day. I own a pair of lacy pug panties. I found them
in an unaddressed mailbox one afternoon, and I just assumed
they were intended for me. I ended up keeping them because
they fit, and also because I already tried them on."

"My mom found me posing in the mirror wearing the
gifted lacy drawers one day. I strut around in them
sometimes, but not often."

"What? I told you that I only look at myself
fur naked sometimes!"

"I love you. Happy Valentines Day."

Daisy and I hope you have a great day today.
And we just want to know one thing.
Will you be our sexy Valentine?

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Someone Is Jealous Of My Sexy

Hi Everyone!

How is your week going?

"My week has been pretty good. The mailman got super
jealous the other day after he saw all the Valentine cards
I received. Thank you! I told him that if he was a dog
person, and was sexier, he might receive a card from
time to time too. Then I turned away, and showed
him my butt-hole."

"After I gave the mailman some advice, I went over
to the park to read my cards. As I was reading my cards,
my mom almost got hit in the head with a frisbee.
People play this frisbee golf game at our park,
and it can be dangerous sometimes.
Smokin soy balls, my mom is
accident prone!"

"Anyway, after the park, my mom had to replace my
food bowl, with this paper bowl here. I am currently
in crisis, and refusing to eat from my real bowl.
I run from it when it's too close to me.
It smells weird. I think someone
farted on it."

Daisy and I hope you have a great Thursday!

Monday, February 7, 2011

I Could Store A Lot Of Treats In This Zebra Head

Hi Everyone!

Did you watch the Super Bowl?
Daisy and I didn't catch the game. Instead, we
were organizing our place, and trying to find a
spot to hang our zebra head.

A few weeks ago, I was over at Anthropologie,
and spotted this paper mache zebra head. I loved it
so much, I went back and bought one! They had a few other
animal heads to choose from, but I had to have this one.

"I don't care what you say, I am using this zebra
head to store my treats in."

"Let me show you how a wild animal howls
after someone tries to steal her bone."

"Just kidding. No one would ever steal my bone.
Even if they did, I have at least eight backups."

"Mmm, this bone is delicious. Can you run over to Target,
and pick up four more? I need a plunger as
well. Don't ask."

We hope you have a great Tuesday!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

You Look Like You Have A Potato Head

Hi Everyone!

How is your weekend going?
Daisy and I spent some of this weekend putting the finishing
touches on our Valentine cards before we sent them out.
I had planned on finishing them a lot sooner, but I
woke up on Thursday morning in a lot of pain.
My jaw was swollen shut, and my mouth
was hurting really bad.

I figured I had an abscess, so I made an emergency appointment
with the dentist. I found out it wasn't an abscess, but rather
severe TMJ that was flared up. It wasn't the best news, but
I was pretty excited I didn't have to undergo an expensive
procedure. If it had been an abscess, I would have had
to barter dog treats, and poo bags for the dentists
time. I don't think he would have agreed to it,
but those purpley poo bags that smell like
grape are pretty amazing.

Luckily, my jaw is better now, and I am working with
the dentist on ways to manage this. Daisy is happy that
I can now get back to buying her that five dollar foot
long sandwich from Subway, and giving her deep
tissue massages. Hooray!

"Hello! This giant bear isn't going to move itself!
I need you to pop a pain pill, and move this bear into the
living room for me. I want to sit on the couch with him
and watch HBO."

"Do we have any green beans? On second thought, I think I
would like my five dollar foot long now. The Ricky Gervais
show is coming on in 36 minutes, so you better hurry up!"

Daisy and I hope you are having a sexy weekend!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Winter Tastes Better When I'm Eating A Sandwich

Hi Everyone!

What have you been up to this week? Are you staying warm?
It's not raining or snowing here in Vegas, but it's pretty cold.
Daisy and I love mild weather, but we're not quite used to
20 degree cold.

Daisy has been insisting on staying warm inside our condo
these past few days. I don't blame her. She occupies her time
by sleeping, and looking sexy while sleeping.

"What's the status on my Uggs? Did you order me a pair yet?
How can you expect me to go outside, and take a poo,
without wearing boots to keep my paws toasty?"

"Can we run by Subway, and pick up a five dollar foot long?
I was dreaming about one of those earlier."

"Five dollar foot long now!"

Daisy and I hope you are having a great week!