"You will not believe what happened to me the other day."
"Bruce and I were sitting at the table eating some cookies,
when all of a sudden, our patio started to flood from all the rain.
The water just kept rising! Can you see how high the water is
behind me? We thought the water was going to come into
our apartment. My mom called maintenance, but they
didn't show up for hours, so we took matters into
our own hands and we taped up the door.
"If the tape hadn't kept the water out, it would have been chaos.
I would have had to blow up my inflatable rafting tube,
and I probably would have ended up floating
down the living room with a tropical
drink in my hand."
"If our apartment gets close to flooding like that again,
someone must grab my cheese balls, my phone book,
my bestess undies, my leopard print scarf
and the 36 Ziploc bags of graham
crackers I have hidden
under the bed."